Drunken Knights of Chess

Top 10 things to consider while playing chess intoxicated:

1. Knights are not invincible. If you move a knight and it's not 

protected your opponent will snuff it out and not apologize. 

2. Each Bishop moves along one color diagonal. Enough said there.

3. Rooks are NOT pawns. Sure they are the same color as your pawns 
but with closer examination they do look like miniature castles.

4. NEVER move your queen at all while playing intoxicated. 

5. The object of the game isn't for your king to reach the finish line.

(See number 9 for "king me" rule.)

6. The pawns are in the game so you can capture one while losing 

miserably and still feel like you've accomplished something worthwhile . 

7. The beer bottle caps....oh wait never mind, they aren't a chess piece.

8.  Playing hungover the next morning will not fix the mistakes you made the night before.

9. There is no "kitty corner" or "king me"  or "double jumps" involved 
unless your opponent is drunk too. In that case House Rules apply.

10. And finally if you think you have a good move, rethink that move. 

Then once you have a better move you need to rethink that one too.
Repeat this step indefinitely until you pass out or vomit onto the chessboard.